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Jon Lester: ‘Hard for me to walk around clubhouse and look guys in the eye right now’

07.22.12 at 7:02 pm ET

In the wake of the worst outing of his major league career, Red Sox lefty Jon Lester didn’t pull any punches when describing his performance on Sunday. Lester allowed 11 runs on 10 hits, including a career-worst four homers in a 15-7 loss at the hands of the Jays Sunday at Fenway.

“I think it pretty much describes itself,” Lester said. “I don’t really need to have any words for it.”

But Lester expanded upon the outing that was disastrous from his very first pitch, a fastball that was driven over the Green Monster by Brett Lawrie.

“It’s never good, it’s embarrassing,” Lester said. “I’ve let my team down a lot this year. It’s hard for me to walk around this clubhouse and look guys in the eye right now. I’m not pitching well. I’m not doing my job. Guys scored seven runs today. We should win this game. Like I said, it’s embarrassing. That’s all I can really say about it.”

[Click here to listen to Jon Lester explain his feelings after the worst start of his career.]

Lester, who is now 5-8 on the season with a 5.46 ERA, was asked what’s gone wrong?

“Name it, everything,” he said.

After the five-run first that he allowed to the Jays, Dustin Pedroia came over to Lester as he was entering the dugout and gave him a pep talk, trying to lift his spirits.

“I still have to go out and do my job,” Lester said. “He did his job today. I have to do my job. That’s what it comes down to. It’s nice guys obviously want you to succeed, not only a business level but a personal level. It’s nice to know guys have my back, which I know they all do. Just have to keep grinding it out.

“[My confidence] obviously not as high as its highest it’s ever been. The thing is no one is going to feel sorry for me. I have to go out and pitch better. I have to pitch better. I’m not worried about my confidence, I’m not worried about my mechanics. I’m not worried about anything but just trying to execute pitches, and I’m not doing that. I’ve got to get back to trying to keep it simple. I can’t worry about the outcome. It cliched and sounds stupid but if I just try to get back to basics of keeping the ball down, up down, and change speeds, maybe things will be different.”

Asked if he believes his fortunes will change soon, with his next start slated for next weekend at Yankee Stadium, Lester was hopeful.

“God I hope so. It’s getting old. I’m not a big fan of sucking, to put it lightly.”

Read More: Boston Red Sox, Brett Lawrie, Dustin Pedroia, Jon Lester
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